Time For England To Forget Messiahs

To ask English football to learn, is usually to ask too much. In the cycle of perpetual misfortune, England have carved themselves a comfortable little place - one festooned with cushions, lights and running water by the very men and women who pray for better everyday.

Wayne Rooney and Jesus Christ have a lot in common. Both are featured in best selling books - Rooney's albeit, of a more recent publication - both have faced trials and tribulations, births and resurrections and both at one point or another have offered hope to a group of disciples, disillusioned with the current state of things.

Both are messiahs. Just as Jesus rose, quickly, stealthily from anonymity, Rooney did too. Rooney scored, Jesus preached. The parallels are there for all to see, the overlap between the lives of two seemingly polar opposite characters.

But then again, it isn't really a shock that comparisons have been made. Religious undertones are an ever present in modern day football reporting - symptomatic of the way religion has been used to articulate the feelings of fans, players and clubs over the last century.

Gathering together en masse on certain days, chanting in unison at the behest of goings on in a central arena it is easy to see why football is fixated with the pseudo-religious role it occupies in the lives of millions.

In England messiahs roam free. They start out, usually, as poor, uneducated sons of laborers only finding the concentration which deserts them in the classroom on the street or pitch or grass. They ascend, gradually up the ladder, reaching first professional and later celebrity status. Invariably though, this is where they fall.

Theo Walcott reached this place with a hat trick in Zagreb, he hasn't scored for England since.Wayne Rooney's performance in Euro 2004 made him a national hero - his slump in later international tournaments emblematic of England's culture of false dawns.

On the eve of two vital European Championship qualifiers, England can no longer afford see their stars fail. Now is the time to abandon messiahs.

Where was Spain's messiah when they triumphed in South Africa? Nowhere. There was no stand out star, no figure, constantly pulling the team to victory. Spain's success was bred of a philosophy, a group of players so together, so harmonious that no savior was required. If England intend to copy Vincente Del Bosque's team, then it is this that they must replicate.

The seeds have already been sown, ironically, by a Scotsman. At the helm of Manchester United for over twenty five years, only now has Sir Alex Ferguson brought together a core of English players able and ready to represent their country.

A center back pairing of Smalling and Jones will likely figure prominently in 2014, a creative tandem of Rooney and Cleverley also sure to be key. Up front, Danny Welbeck continues to improve, come the next World Cup fans should expect the finished product.

"They have done well at a very big side and they have come into the England squad and felt very assured - and rightly so because they are huge talents. They've got an awful lot to give," said Terry of Jones, Smalling and Cleverley.


"You don't go into the Manchester United side if you are not ready and they have showed some great individual performances." Ringing endorsement from a man who has done his fair share of messianic duty.


Delve further into United's youth system, and a slew of talent emerges into view. Ryan Tunnelcliffe is highly regarded and, should he shake off personal problems, Ravel Morrison's future will be bright as well.

Writing optimistically about England's prospects is always risky business, but even the most jaded of fans  appreciate the reservoir of talent set to irrigate English national team football for the next decade. If, and it is a big if, United can develop the kind of relationship with England that clubs like Honved, Barcelona and Ajax have made with their respective countries, then perhaps all those years of hurt might come to an end.

Hargreaves' Story All Too Familiar For United

So often caught on the wrong side of the moral spectrum, Manchester City will relish this opportunity to make their rivals look just as base.


Known for his charitable work, and reportedly willing to play for free, United threw Hargreaves to the wayside, presumably believing that injuries had finally overwhelmed the once great player.

 A two time Champions League winner, Hargreaves is about as cosmopolitan as an Englishman can be - fluent in German and an expert penalty taker. During his time at Bayern Munich, he gained legitimate respect from more broadly versed European football observers, his talents appreciated as being many varied and translatable to more than just the parochial atmosphere of English football.

At the 2006 World Cup, a series of dynamic performances - culminating in a penalty conversion against Portugal - earned Hargreaves the attention of Sir Alex Ferguson and, eventually, a move to Manchester United in the summer of 2007.

"It has been a long time coming - it was probably the worst kept secret in football." said Hargreaves after sealing the switch. Certainly, no similar claim could be made about his move to City.

So dire was Hargreaves' situation, that he was forced to post fitness videos on YouTube to convince potential suitors of his worth. Clearly, Roy Hodgson and West Bromich Albion were impressed by his ability to weave in and out of cones, as it was they who registered a first major interest.

"We believe he is capable of playing top flight football and we are very interested in him," said Hodgson. Having passed a "minor medical" at the Hawthornes, a move to the midlands seemed a certainty only for football's transfer juggernauts to once again steal the show.

Rumors breaking Tuesday were confirmed by images of Hargreaves apparently undergoing a three hour medical at Manchester City's Carrington training ground, with a view to a move before the transfer deadline. For Manchester United, the story echoes of Carlos Tevez.

The last player to breach the divide, Tevez was also cast away having failed to earn the full trust of Ferguson. United were frankly lucky that Tevez's role as City's star striker never effected their own fortunes particularly greatly, but what it did do was change the perception of Fergie's "noisy neighbors." From Chelsea wannabees to Champions League contenders, City's meteoric rise will eventually see United unseated.

The part Tevez played in the drama should not be undervalued, even if his ties with both clubs are becoming increasingly strained. His is the story of a player who left Old Trafford and excelled, contradicting Ferguson's oft stated rule in most ironic style.

Now that the Mancunian battle is becoming a title tussle as well as grudge match, United cannot afford to see their rejects perform across town. In Owen Hargreaves, City have found just the player they need, a much, much richer man's Gareth Barry - the midfielder who might have made two Champions League finals interesting.

Grasping for motivation to succeed, Hargreaves like Tevez will not have to look far. The nature of his departure from Old Trafford - complete with patronizing good luck wishes and dismissive shrugs from impatient fans - should be enough to get blood flowing.

The challenge is immense, but the prospect of success will keep Hargreaves going. After three years of turmoil, the end is in sight; the reward for lonely hours in the gym, and countless slices by the surgeon's knife.

United though, must pray that their midfield crock doesn't turn into City's final jigsaw piece.

Joe Cole Could Be The Key... For Someone

Cole should perhaps be considered one of English football's tragedies; a player with skill and technique to rival some of the world's best, yet a career lacking the requisite coherency to be considered great.

Though, it hasn't been a bad few years for Cole; he is a three time Premier League champion, and boasts a collection of cup winners medals, but the English international has never consistently performed for any one his clubs, seeing the door at Chelsea, and failing to nail down a first team spot at Liverpool.

Tactical indiscipine was an accusation made by Mourinho, injuries used as an excuse by fans of the player; two polar opposites, and two elements of his game which have kept that talented man behind the rest.

However, all is not lost in the career of Joe Cole; players who have starred at World Cups, won Premier Leagues and prompted one of the most notable free agent frenzies in Premier League history tend to have a bit of game about them too. Unfortunately though, Liverpool does not look to be the site of Joe Cole's potential resurrection, Dalglish is far too focused on bringing in mediocre Brits to even attempt to harness an enigmatic talent.

No, Joe Cole would do well to steer well clear of Liverpool, and bring his services elsewhere, whether it be to a stepping stone club looking for a big name, or to the home of football's transfer wizard, and into the shoes of a rebellious Croatian.

As indicated by the title, Joe Cole could be someone's secret weapon next season, as they say, form is temporary, class is permanent, and Joe Cole is a man not lacking in class.

Perhaps rising club Aston Villa, a team in need of creative talent after two high profile exits, could be the Londoner's next destination, or maybe even the more exotic climate of the Serie A, and a place with one of Italy's top six.

Joe Cole has the technical ability to play in leagues around the World, unlike other British players, his game has a somewhat cosmopolitan feel to it, though that tactical indiscipline would have to be improved upon. 

While clubs may be the most obvious beneficiaries of Joe Cole's future travails, the English national team would also be done no harm if the former West Ham man were to enjoy a renaissance. Often times stodgy and predictable, England would only be improved by Cole's creative spark, he could act as a place holder, before Josh McEachran proves himself mature enough for inclusion.

England, Villa, Tottenham, who knows... but maybe, just maybe, next season could be Joe Cole's year.

Feel free to comment with your take on the Joe Cole situation.

Follow The Chairman on Twitter @INFTH

Today's Women's World Cup Farce, And Two Other Handballs That Rocked The World

Immortalized in legos..

1. Bruna vs Australia- Let me paint the picture for you. It's one-nil Australia at the Women's World Cup, both the Australians and opponents Equatorial Guinea are badly in need of a win to salvage their chances of qualifying from Group D. A cross from the left is steered onto the post by an Australian attacker, from there it rebounds into the arms of Bruna, a defender for Equatorial Guinea. Without batting an eyelid, the number two catches the ball, takes a step and drops it again, before casually jogging away amidst mass protests within the Australian ranks.

I don't know which is more bizarre, Bruna deciding to catch the ball, or the referee somehow not noticing. Either way, this latest farce will do nothing to silence skeptics who refuse to appreciate the women's game, though on the other hand, it might attract a few NBA fans looking for entertainment during the lockout.

2. Henry vs Republic of Ireland- Perhaps the most blatant example of cheating since Maradona in 1986, Henry's handball sent the footballing World into meltdown. Call for punishment was immediate, the more civil minded Irish asking for a ban, the less so, castration.

In the end, Henry emerged out of the incident with his reputation slightly sullied, but without any major punishment from the footballing bodies. Karma would soon do its job though...

3. Maradona vs England- Football's original sin, Maradona's hand of god goal at the 1986 World Cup remains the most famous instance of cheating in all of sporting history. Jumping up, Maradona managed to punch the ball beyond English goalkeeper Peter Shilton, to score a goal that would eventually consign England to a World Cup exit.

Famously, Maradona refused to accept blame initially, calling the goal "the hand of God." However, unlike Henry, karma never came into play, not only did Maradona go on to score the goal widely regarded as the greatest of all time in that very game, but Argentina went on to win the World Cup.